Saturday, December 3, 2011

A Man's Best Friend

So my guess is that if you are reading this you are one of two things.  Either you are unemployed/holding a shit job that is going nowhere, or you have simply started reading because you have nothing better to do at whatever o’clock on a Saturday evening (yes we have no friends, but we have this blog!).  Well if you’re the latter, I will try to cater to your slowly drying eyes and make this worth a read.

The past month has been hard.  Actually, It’s been downright suffocating.  I have been turned away from numerous jobs, and I don’t even want to think about the number of resumes I have sitting on some nameless person’s desk.  My bank account is telling me I am in serious trouble and the creditors are threatening to start calling me.  Honestly, I’m not too sure how I will pay January rent.

But I digress.  If you are unemployed like me, you have probably figured out that you’re not the only person who is dealing with the whole no money coming in problem.  You have your parents calling to check in and see if you have ceased to be a complete failure.  If you have a significant other, you can feel the growing tension now that the rent check has actually gone through and there is no money left.  If you live with others, you have to understand that they are more than likely trying to figure out whether you will continue to be a dead beat or actually be able to pay bills and rent next month.  Yes, the walls are closing in.  You are running out of options, and that pizza place down the street that’s hiring is starting to look more appealing with every passing day.

Have no fear.  All your problems can be solved with one thing: buying a dog.  I know it sounds a bit ridiculous, but hear me out.  Studies have shown that owning a dog can directly affect the healing process of someone recovering from a serious illness.  Also, according to Dr. Deborah Wells of Queen’s University, “It is possible that dogs can directly promote our well-being by buffering us from stress.  The ownership can also lead to increases in physical activity and facilitate the development of social contacts, which may enhance physiological and psychological human health in a more indirect manner”.  Basically what she is trying to say is, dogs get you off your fat ass and make you lose some pounds.  They help us meet chicks (or dudes) and they keep us from going crazy.  Oh yeah, and they make us happy.  A doctor said it, so naturally I believe it.

But honestly, think about it.  A dog will never judge you or tell you that you are totally dropping the ball on life.  They will never be mad at you, even if you forget to take them out for a quick romp around the park.  Assuming you aren’t going to be a terrible owner, having a dog will also force you to develop some kind of a daily schedule.  Feed, pet, take out to pee, take out to drop a deuce, take on a walk, feed, pet, pet, pet, pet, take out for deuce number two, pet, bed, repeat.  Get it?  It’s a perfect tool to automatically make you more responsible and motivated.  You have a dependant now, so start acting like it.

Now with that being said, if you absolutely can’t afford a dog, try not to go making brash decisions and come home with a cute little kitten some Wednesday afternoon.  Don’t get me wrong, I love cats, but at this point in the game you need something that is 100% supportive of your life decisions.  I cat starts judging you the second it reaches adulthood.  Say you have to make a budget cut and buy the cheaper cat food; rest assured they would not forgive that.  Forget to change the litter box; they might just dump on your bed tonight.  Try updating your resume with a cat.  Laptops are the equivalent to sitting next to a fire, only they are sitting in the fire.  Plus, they are always planning something.  If you look a cat in the eye, its only obvious there is some ulterior motive to why they have decided to sit on your lap.  Just think about it.  They could honestly care less about you.  You know they know their name, but they’ll be god damned if they ever answer to.

Considering what this blog concentrates on, while adding humor about living within very tight budgets, a dog may or may not fit your financial situation. I mean, it is absolutely not an option for me at the moment. So, be smart and be sure that you can offer a dog a home it deserves. Always keep in mind that the dog is a living creature and has food costs and vet visits. With that being said, if you have come to a point where you are interested in getting a little companion, we have some amazing, yet budget-in-mind options. 

Seems obvious, but is a trustworthy site and a site that is ultimately commited to the well being of the dogs. You can adopt dogs in your area, find your desired breed, and even find local shelters. 

If you can successfully get over becoming attached to just one dog, and want to help, while still gaining companionship... fostering may be up your ally. Becoming a foster home for dogs is an amazing opportunity for some, and I suggest looking into organizations such as or talk to your local Humane Society. 

This is always a safe bet in the hunt for a dog. But, be prepared before venturing to the Humane Society to just "browse" the selection. Unless you're almost 100% on getting a dog that day, you will leave there with guilt and wanting to take all the dog home. Humane Society is usually little to no cost, and offers spays on their dogs upon purchase, which is beneficial with your budget. 

Written By: Adam E. Hascall and Elyse E. Tishuk


  1. Finally someone gets why I have 5 dogs. I need serious obligatory responsibility creating habits in order to tame my free spirit, and constant encouragements of happiness in order to mentally handle being tamed!!!!!!!

  2. 5 dogs?! Whew! Glad to know we are not the only ones in this world finding dogs to be the answer to everything.